Analyzing the Impact of Aryana’s Music on Diverse Audiences Introduction: Aryana, a young Afghan-American artist, has been making waves in the music industry with her unique blend of traditional Afghan music and contemporary pop. While her music

Thank you for your resubmission. This essay is much stronger in terms of its focus. Much more defined. While I enjoyed your thesis about Aryana, the remainder of your essay had similar issues as mentioned in the previous draft.
More specifically, I wanted to know which part of her lyrics speak to people from other cultures and demographics. This is a large part of the prompt, and is unfortunately still missing from this essay.  
The teacher comments